A Rough Start

This week has not gone at all how I imagined it would. Last week ended on a really sour note, and then Monday was spent with me in the ER in extreme pain. I am still recovering from, what I believe was a burst ovarian cyst. I woke up to nurse Baby Hercules, and ending crying from what felt a javelin thrust through my lower left abdomen.

By the time we got to the ER, the pain had decrease to a mostly tolerable level, but I wanted to make sure there wasn’t any complications, like my ovary twisting. 5 hours later and a male doctor telling me I was experiencing “mittelschmerz” I finally got some drugs, Tylenol, and sent home.

At least they gave us a large room…

I could have given myself Tylenol, and no, ovulation pain, does not reduce a 30 year old woman into a puddle of tears and withering in pain. So completely unsatisfied with my care, we left the hospital and are looking forward to the medical bills for some Tylenol.

Medical care in this country is ridiculous. Women, especially, are treated poorly, and not listened too. Don’t get me started on women of color and how extremely terrible they are treated. Need an example, read about Serena Williams, here.

We need to do better, for all.

Product Review: Generic Value Products Conditioning Balm

Last week, I talked about how I have transitioned from trying to control my hair into accepting and learning what it needs. In the almost 8 months I have been a Curly Girl, I have found a few products my hair LOVES and a few my hair HATES. My number one “I love this product” is from Sally’s Beauty Supply, Generic Value Products Conditioning Balm.

It says right on the bottle “Compare to: Matrix ® Biolage ® Conditioning Balm”. Price wise, the GVP version is less than half the price of the Matrix version. Now I have not tried the Matrix product, so I can not compare the actual products, but I do know that paying $19 for a smaller bottle is not going to happen.

Source Regularly $6.79 for 16 FL oz
Source Regularly $19 for 13.5 FL oz at Ulta

I like that this conditioner can lather up a little, like a shampoo does. The lathering helps to make me feel like I am shampooing and therefore cleaning my hair. Even though, it is not the lathering that is cleaning, when you co-wash it the the scrubbing of your scalp that does the cleaning.

Some people complain that the conditioner is too heavy and it weighs down their curls. I make sure to rinse it all the way out, and don’t use any leave-in other than the curl cream, Curls Blueberry Creme Brulee.

I use it both for my co-wash and for conditioning, and so I go through about a bottle a month. It has little fragrance to it, so it’s not strong and overpowering like some products.

Another thing I love, is when it goes on sale for buy 2 get 1 free! So instead of spending $6.19 a bottle (I have the beauty card that saves me 60 cents a bottle.) I can get them for about $4 a bottle. Sally’s just recently had this sale so I ordered myself 6 bottles and a couple other things (to get free shipping, all things I will use). I got a salon cape for the boys for when I cut their hair. I also got two sets of clips for root clipping for volume. I spent less than $30 when all said and done! Now, I have enough conditioner for the next 6 months, I hope!

Summer 2018- Part 1

This summer we created a list of 18 things to do. I do this list so that we have something to do other than not melt in the Texas heat. We did not get to everything on the list, but here are the ones that we did!

1: Learn to ride a bike!

All decked out in safety gear to practice.

Mr. Z got a bike for Christmas last year, and getting him to learn to ride it has not been easy. We did get a few practice sessions in.

2: Ride a pony.

A mom’s group that we are in, has a summer trip out to one of the members home, where she has horses and a pony. She leads the kids around for a ride on the pony. We went, but Mr. Z was scared of the large animals and wouldn’t ride or touch it. I am hopeful, that one year he will ride the pony!

3: Vacation Bible School!

He loved the sport themed VBS.

Mr. Z did two weeks of VBS. IT WAS AMAZING, for us at least! Both were evening sessions and so we got to have time with just Baby Hercules. Mr. Z did enjoy VBS and loved having fun crafts to learn about bible stories.

4: Finish Summer Reading

Summer reading logs

Our library does the national summer reading program, but it is very different from our old library in Pullman. Most of the prizes here are coupons for discounted or free kids meals. But we do summer reading, more for the fun of making sure we read every day in the summer. This summer we read The BFG and James and the Giant Peach. Mr. Z loved them and I think reading at lunch will be a summer tradition for us.

5: One Week of NO TV!

This was one that Mr. Z was not excited for at all. But I knew we needed it. The first few days were hard, but by Wednesday, TV time wasn’t even asked for. We have also carried over no TV Sundays, from this.

6: Visit the 3 Splash Pads.

Mr. Z is great at making friends with everyone at the parks.

This one is one of my favorite things to do in the summer, plus, with Baby Hercules getting more mobile over the summer, he also enjoyed the splash pads. We have 3 splash pads at different city parks. One is our favorite and one we don’t really like, but I don’t like going to the same place every time. So I wanted to make sure we went to each one this year.

7: Find a 4-leaf Clover.

Mr. Z was unsuccessful in his search.

8: Read The BFG!

It only took us 10 days to read.

Like I said in 4, we did read it. It was so fun to read at lunch in the summer. Mr. Z just loved it and if I could, I think he would have wanted me to read it in one sitting!

9: Make Popsicles.

One of our favorite things, we have a couple different molds, and we like coming up with fun fruit and juice mixes. Mr. Z’s favorite this summer was strawberries and blueberries with orange juice.

 

Next week I’ll post the other 9 things on our 2018 Summer list.

Christmas Stockings

 

In January of 2015, I decided to start a needlepoint kit stocking for Mr. Z.

By Thanksgiving 2016, I realized that I would never finish it. So I started knitting us stockings.

By Christmas 2016, I had finished one for Mr. Z and Mr. Wonderful.

And I January 2017, I had finished mine.

I started Baby Hercules’ stocking in January this year, and am close to finishing it. Having a stocking for everyone in the family will be great! Especially, since before Christmas 2016, no one had one!

I know it is early to think of what Christmas crafts you have planned, but please share what you are doing! I have some other ones I have been working on, but I can’t share those until after Christmas.

 

What Am I Reading: The Poldark Saga

A couple of years ago, I saw an ad on our Amazon Fire TV for a new show called Poldark. It is a historical fiction in post American revolution England. I really enjoyed it and looked anxiously forward to the next season. About the time Baby Hercules was born season three was out and if you have not seen it, I will just say the ending left me wanting to know what happened.

I didn’t not want to wait, so I did some research and learned that it is based off a 12 book series by, Winston Graham. I was able to get the first book from my local library’s overdrive ebook system.

Having already seen the first three seasons the first 6 books were slow reading as I knew what was going to happen. As with all screen adaptations there were little details missing. Which as added to the story.

Demelza is by far my favorite character. The development of her transformation from miner’s daughter to a squire’s wife is fascinating. The internal battles she has with some of the choices she makes or how she is going to react to a choice Ross has made are relatable, even though the novels take place centuries ago.

One thing about the saga that I don’t enjoy is how about book five the tone changes. The main reason is probably because there is a 20 year gap between when Winston Graham wrote and published the books. New characters are brought in and the focus changes from Ross and Francis Poldark and their quarreling with George Warleggan to the siblings of Demelza and the now feud between everyone not a Warleggan.

I am about half was through book seven and I have about a 8 week weight for book eight. (At one point is was 18 weeks!) I hope that my wait is not that long and I am desperately wanting to know why George hates Ross Poldark so much that he must destroy everything.

Budgeting-Groceries

Have y’all seen the grocery haul videos on YouTube? They are when some budget blogger goes over everything they purchased at the store that week and how much they spent. Usually, the person is single and able to get everything for some crazy low amount. OR they have some crazy large family and bought a ton of processed food for cheap.

Well, I am not single, we are a family of 4. We also, live on a graduate student stipend. Our grocery budget is small and not really flexible. We budget about $70 a week. Some weeks, depending on the sales, we go over stocking up on meat or something non perishable. Some months, there is more month than money.

I don’t think we eat extravagantly. But I wanted to share what a real family actually buys and eats. So I added a menu for the month. You can see it here. I usually meal plan for the week, so I will add to it every week. I have also added links to recipes for some things.

This week’s grocery shopping trip I went to Aldi and HEB, two of my FAVORITE grocery stores.

At Aldi I spent $28.49 and here is what I got:

Aldi Grocery Haul

Mango salsa, pretzels, raw honey, butter (2 lbs), organic whole milk yogurt (I love this yogurt), 2 limes, low sodium bacon, garlic bulbs, brown mushrooms, cilantro, broccoli crowns, romaine hearts, and carrots.

At HEB I spent $51.99 and got:

HEB Grocery Haul

Cheerios, Honey Nut Cheerios, vegetable broth (2), unbleached all-purpose flour (2), canola oil mayo, roasted red pepper hummus (2, they were out of the big tub we usually get), one grapefruit (per Mr. Z’s request), extra virgin olive oil, oatmeal digestive cookies (these are for Baby Hercules), ranch dressing, apple cider vinegar, Mexican blend shredded cheese (2 lbs bag), granola bars, instant oatmeal packets (one apple cinnamon and two maple and brown sugar).

In total, we spent $80.48. Yes, we are over, but I had to get a few items that are more expensive, olive oil and honey, that we don’t normally need. Without those two items we would have spent $66.03. Sometimes we spend more, sometimes we spend less. I also was able to buy a couple of duplicate items for things that we use regularly, like an extra bag of flour, extra oatmeal, and broth. Let’s see how next week goes! Budget goal is is spend less that $68.

Righteous Fathers

Last week, I attended church in the congregation I went to in high school. After about 15 years, the building has been renovation, families have moved in and out. It was the building my mother’s funeral was held. It is strange to go back.

I only went to see my old young women’s leader. She is always so welcoming and happy. It was great to see her and chat for a bit.

While my belief in god is different from most if not all members of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints, attending church is not something I enjoy. Sunday’s are work, emotionally and physically draining.

I had plans just to attend the first hour of church and honestly, zone out while I wrestled baby Hercules. I got the opportunity to actually listen to the speakers.

The first spoke on the church’s environmental stance. Check out this website, where he got most of his talk.

The third speaker talked on the new ministering program that the church has changed from home teaching and visiting teaching.

The middle speaker is the one I want to really talk about. His talk was on father’s, specifically how to be a righteous father.

This is somewhat of a sore subject for me, especially in that building. I grew up in a “part member family”. My mother was the one who took us to church, who did all the churchy things. My dad wanted nothing to do with the church for as long as I can remember.

Many lessons on the priesthood ended with me walking out because a teacher would single me out. “Oh you don’t know what it’s like to have the priesthood in your home.” “You are a lost soul because your father won’t join the church.” “You can never fully understand the importance of the priesthood without it in your home.”

I would walk out because that teacher was not only being rude, but was completely WRONG.

When this speaker started talking, I expected more of this, but he didn’t. He started his talk saying, “Most of us assume that to be a righteous father, he must have the priesthood, but that is not true. A father can be righteous without ever stepping foot inside our or any other church. The gospel does not automatically make us righteous fathers.”

I wanted to stand up and yell, “One more time for the people in the back!”

Source

I had NEVER heard that from the pulpit at church. This speaker wasn’t someone who didn’t know me, for awhile I think he was one of our home teachers.

How often in the church, do we ASSUME that just because he has the priesthood, this guy is a good upstanding person. It’s not true! Having the ‘priesthood’ doesn’t just magically cover up the fact that this person really is a sleazeball. “Faith” in a higher being does not make us automatically perfect righteous people. It takes hard work to be a genuine decent person. Something we all can work on, present company included.

So remember next time you are a church and someone says something boneheaded, “The Gospel does not automatically make us righteous people.”

 

Curly Girl

Having a new baby, means a lot has gone to the wayside. Now that life, has kinda reached a normal, I am ready to really dive in to this blogging scene.

NourishingWhole is all about self discovery and becoming the best me. Recently, I decided to accept that I have CURLY HAIR. For women it is huge thing, and I have been working on it for a couple of years now.

Moving to Texas has helped me to see that fighting my natural hair is just. not. worth. it!

2016, Texas, Learning what the Texas humidity does to my hair.

I really like minimal effort things: recipes, hair styles, makeup, everything. So when I decided to try The Curly Girl Method, I wanted something basic and simple.

Oct 2017, before going full curly girl, still fighting the humidity.

When I first tried it, I could not figure out co-washing (washing your hair with conditioner) and just felt like my hair was constantly greasy. So I gave up. But I stuck with natural products not full of sulfates and silicones.

January 2018, pre-curly girl

In January, a friend found and added me to a facebook group that was full of thousands of women around the world who are going “full curly girl”. I start reading posts, files, and comments. I watch video after video, and I decide to give it another try.

January 16, 2018 I started the Curly Girl Method and have yet to look back! I am LOVING it. My hair is healthy, my curls are the best I have ever seen them, and I have simple routine that I love.

My routine:

Co-wash: Generic Value Products Conditioning Balm

Conditioner: Generic Value Products Conditioning Balm (leaving in while I finish my shower, about 5 mins) Rinse with cold water.

Squeeze out as much water as possible and then finger comb in Curls Creme Brule whipped curl cream and “plop” while I get dressed. After I am dressed, and usually after having to stop and feed baby Hercules, I then use praying hands and scrunch in Herbal Essence Body Envy Volumizing Mousse until I have nice big clumps. Then I defuse with my head upside down, to help with volume, until dry. (This TAKES FOREVER, so I usually only do it on Sunday or for dates) Once it is dry I, fluff and scrunch out any crunchy parts with the damp cloth I plopped with.

I chopped my hair too! 7 months in and I am loving my hair!

Look at those curls!

 

Blueberry Muffins

I have been working on this recipe as a Christmas recipe actually. Growing up my mom rarely made anything “fun” for breakfast, that was my dad. I remember Saturday mornings all of us anxiously waiting for the next waffle to be ready.

But this isn’t about waffles, it is about blueberry muffins, which we only got “homemade” for Christmas breakfast. Mom wasn’t one to make things from scratch, so the Kruteaz Blueberry Muffin mix became a staple for us on Christmas morning.

When creating this recipe I wanted muffins that were sweet, fluffy, and jammed packed with blueberries. These muffins are exactly that. To make sure the blueberries don’t sink or that the muffins are overly moist, be sure to use canned blueberries. The brand that I have been able to find at almost any grocery store is the black can, Oregon Specialty Fruit.

The blueberries are canned in a light syrup, but the ingredient label is 3 things: blueberries, water, and cane sugar. They are also large berries not those tiny Maine blueberries.

This recipe has a little customization, in that you can use either palm shortening, vegetable shortening, or butter for the solid fat and for the milk, you can use whatever your milk of choice is. I will say, that these brown nicer with cows milk.

Enjoy these not just on Christmas morning!


Blueberry Muffins
 
Prep time
Cook time
Total time
 
Sweet, fluffy, and jammed packed with blueberries, these muffins are to be enjoyed not just for Christmas morning.
Ashley Teare:
Recipe type: Breakfast
Serves: 12
Ingredients
  • 57g (¼ c) Shortening ( Palm, vegetable, dairy free butter or butter of choice)
  • 113g (½ c) white sugar
  • ¾ tsp xanthan gum
  • 1 eggs
  • 44g (⅓ c) Tapioca Starch
  • 64g (⅓ c) Potato Starch
  • 55g (⅓ c) white rice flour
  • 2 tsp Baking powder
  • ¼ tsp sea salt
  • ¼ c milk of choice
  • 1 tsp vanilla extra
  • 1 can of Oregon canned blueberries, drained
Directions
  1. Preheat oven to 350 and grease or line a muffin tins
  2. Cream together the shortening, sugar, and xanthan gum.
  3. Add in the egg and mix until well combined
  4. In a separate bowl, sift together the starches, flour, baking powder, and salt.
  5. Add to sugar mixture alternating with the milk and vanilla extra ending with the flours.
  6. Fold in the blueberries.
  7. Fill prepared muffin tins ⅔ full and bake for 20-25 minutes. Rotate about halfway through baking.

 

 

A birth Story, part 2

Looking for part one? Here is a link.

We have been taken up to Labor and Delivery, and are put in a closet.

Seriously, this room is so small the bed and two chairs hardly fit. She attaches me to the oh so lovely monitors and says I need to be still for 20 minutes so they can check on baby. Then she will run the test to check that my water has broken and to see how dilated I am. Oh and “if” I am having decent contractions they will admit me. Awesome, everything stops. So I lay there attached listening to the baby’s heartbeat and waiting. Nurse, after we tell her that this isn’t baby number one, we kinda know what is going on, decides to check me and do the test before making me sit on the monitors for 20 minutes. So she does that, repositions things and leaves.

The doula looks at the output and says that when we first got there I was contracting every 4 minutes, now after about an hour of sitting, it was about every 10. I don’t feel the contractions, I feel tightening but it isn’t uncomfortable. The nurse comes back in and says that she talked to Dr. Rice (my doctor, not the doctor on the floor like she planned to) and I am getting admitted to have a baby, and that we will be in the low intervention room. Dr. Rice comes about noon and we talk about what our options are.

At this point we had been in the hospital for two hours and things had basically stopped. She gave us some options: walking, nipple stimulation with the a breast pump, the Cooks Balloon. I ask, “what is the time line?”, I know we are on a clock now, so what does SHE need to see and when. Ideally she wants baby here by 2 am. At 8 pm if things are not moving she would like to start pitocin. We decide to eat lunch, and walk until doctor will be back after office hours about 3.30 pm.

Mr. Wonderful runs and gets lunch, and Rachel, our doula, and I start walking… We pause for lunch and we walk more. Rachel leaves to take care of a few things at home. So Mr. Wonderful and I walk a little and have some “adult time”, and get back to walking. Dr. Rice comes back and checks me and does a cervical message and says that I am at a 3 and if she wanted to be generous I could be stretched to a 4. Baby head was coming down, but we still had a lot of work to do.

Back to walking, and walking, and walking. Now, I wasn’t just pacing the halls, I would get a contraction and I would stop, hold onto the handrails and try to just let everything go as loose and relaxed as I could. Around 5, I ask the nurse to check me, feeling like I was maybe at a 7, only to have her say, “Well would you like to try the breast pump now?” (I am not actually told where I am at.) Disappointed, I say I would like to eat dinner because I know it is going to be a long night and I try to take a little nap. Mr. Wonderful lays with me for a bit and I tell him that I am feeling really disappointed and really lacking the motivation to do this. 8 pm seems so close and I don’t want to have pitocin. Plus, I am trying to relax but I am afraid that I will just go backwards if I do nap. He goes and talks to the nurse and Rachel before going to get dinner. Rachel comes over and talks to me about how far I have progressed already in a short amount of time and that taking a nap won’t close my cervix, and that it might actually help me to relax and help me later having conserved some energy.

So I try to nap, but I start to get some contractions in bed. (The low intervention suites at this hospital have really comfy queen sized beds, so I had lots of room.) After a few contractions I decide to walk more because it was more comfortable. So off Rachel and I go. Mr. Wonderful comes back with dinner and I eat a few bites and decide that if I keep eating I am going to throw it up, and I really don’t want to ruin Chick-Fil-A. I pace the room while Rachel and Mr. Wonderful finish eating and start to have some good contractions.

We stay in the room and we put a large exercise/birth ball on the bed and I am leaning over it and squatting during the contractions. At about 7, I let out a good moan that has Mr. Wonderful and Rachel ask, how was that different? Shortly, my two nurses come in, the day nurse and the night nurse, shift change. They contact Dr. Rice and she comes right over. I am oblivious to most of what is going on, just doing my thing and making jokes about the music choices Mr. Wonderful is playing.

At this point in my head, I have an hour before the doctor hooks me up to the pitocin and in my mind everything will cascade. The doctor checks me after she get there and tells me I can’t push, I still have work to do. So I keep going; swaying, squatting, grunting, moaning and changing positions: Standing, kneeling, lying down, on my side, you name it. The doctor checks me again probably about an hour later and tells me I am really close, I have a lip that needs to open up before I can push. I don’t know what time it is, I haven’t noticed that they have wheeled in a few things, or that there is a nursing student watching me.

I just keep doing what I am doing, until I start to express to Mr. Wonderful how I really can’t do this anymore. In my head I am thinking about how great some drugs would be, and am trying to think about how to ask from something, “Maybe they can just give me some Tylenol.” is what I am trying to figure out how to express. Things keep going, I roll over exhausted, and say “I can’t do it, it hurts too much and is too hard.” Dr. Rice checks me again and says I can start pushing if I want.

Now this whole time I have to poop. I have already mentioned it, and the staff joked about how it was for them, my nurse, doctor and doula, all in turn share and we all kinda chuckle about it. So I keep just trying to poop, but I also don’t want to push too hard, because I don’t want to tear really badly like it did with Mr. Z. So now that I am feeling mentally and physically done and have given a few pushes, the doctor tells me she is going to help things move and relieves me. I think, ok sure, whatever, I don’t think this baby is really ever going to make it out of me.

Doctor is coaching me, and has been doing hot compresses to help keep things loose to help prevent tearing. I finally say, “I am done, I can not do this.” “I need you to give me one good push on this next contraction.” I start to push but then I am worried about tearing and stop in the middle. “NO! Don’t stop, keep pushing.” “I can’t! It hurts too much.” “Baby’s head is right here, PUSH!”

So I do, I push, it burns, I know I tore, but baby head is born, my water fully brakes in a gush and the rest of baby slides right out. Baby Boy Teare was born at 9.27 PM. Mr. Wonderful announced to the room it was a boy, as he gets placed on my chest, and I comment on how much hair he has. We get about an hour of time with baby on me and I get to latch him and nurse him before they take him and weigh and measure. Mr. Wonderful got to help with all of that in the room. He was 5 pounds and 14.8 ounces and 18.5 inches long. I had a second degree tear and Dr. Rice did an extra thorough job of checking and there wasn’t any extra damage like with Mr. Z, recovery has been so much better than with him.

meeting momma

First latch
First latch