ramblings – NourishingWhole

Book Review: Hidden Figures

I have been listening to “Hidden Figures”, by Margot Lee Shetterly. I have not seen the movie yet, but on my recent trip to Washington State for a friends wedding, the person sitting in front of me on the plane watched it. So I saw a few bits of it, and decided it was going to be my next book.

I like alternating fiction with nonfiction, and since I have a LOOOONG wait for the next Poldark book it’s perfect. I am listening to it, and so whenever I am in the car it is playing.

I actually started “the book” in early September, when I was looking for something to listen to on my drive to my grandparents. My only option was the “Young Readers Edition”. I tried to figure out if that meant it was an abridged version, I am still learning the Libby app. I finished “the Book”, and thought it was great!

I was looking for another book for my drive home from my grandparents and I found Hidden Figures but this time it said it was 11 hours long… I listened to BOTH versions!

The young reader edition doesn’t leave out anything, it does not go into as much details, especially about historical events that coincide with the women working at Langley. Either book is good, and talks about the huge barriers these women over came.

I especially liked the epilogue in the unabridged version. Shetterly talks about why we have not heard these stories. We have to remember that with women rights movements, civil right movements, and all the different movements that have happened and are happening, are changing the world we live in.

Just will the #metoo and #whyididntreport movements, times have changed. Internet has allowed more access to things, and these remarkable women paved the way for generations of girls to live their dreams.

Book Review: Astrophysics For People in a Hurry

I have recently discovered audio books, and I love them! When we lived in Washington, the libraries used one common online library. It had a decent selection. In Texas, that is not how the online system works. Each library has their own and they can be really lacking.

I learned, when I started reading the Poldark Saga, that as a Texas resident I have access to the Harris County online library. I got a card for the library and have been A.M.A.Z.E.D. at the selection of books this library has.

I found “Astrophysics For People in a Hurry” by Neil deGrasse Tyson when I ended up having to drive to Austin at midnight, and wanted something interesting yet fun to listen to so I could stay awake. It didn’t hurt that the author read it.

Having an engineering background I know a little bit about physics, and having always wanted to be an astronaut, I knew this book would be interesting. Tyson, does a great job explaining and walking you through the theories on how the universe works.

It is a quick read/listen at only about 4 hours long, it was perfect for my drive to and from the Austin airport. If you are at all curious about the universe check it out, you will not be disappointed.

Today, I Needed the Hug

Mr. Z: Daddy, will you come have lunch with me today?

Mr. Wonderful: I can’t today, I have to finish a big project. I don’t get to even stop for lunch, I eat while I work on it.

Mr. Z, sad: Soon?

Mr. Wonderful: YES!

The conversation this morning, broke my heart. I remember wanting and asking my parents to eat lunch with me at school, but they always were “too busy.” What does “too busy” even mean when it comes to our children?

This morning I left late to get run some errands, and on my way home I had to drive by a 3 car rollover accident involving a garbage truck, a sports car, and the same make, model, and color compact SUV that I drive. The SUV was the one that flipped.

I was on my way home from a 2 mile walk, sweaty and wanting to shower. Baby Hercules needed a diaper change and I didn’t bring any. After driving past this accident, and seeing “my” car, I needed to hold my babies. Remembering the conversation my two Misters had this morning out the door, I glanced at the clock, decided to forgo the shower, got lunch and showed up for lunch with Mr. Z.

We had a fun little lunch together, and he enjoyed that I surprised him with Whataburger. He also didn’t mind that I needed to hold and love on him.

It is important to me that I let my children know that they are on my “Most Important” list. I don’t want to be “too busy” to go to lunch at school with my kids. If that means, we have to sacrifice the income that me working would bring in, and we eat rice and beans multiple times a week, then that is what it looks like.

A Rough Start

This week has not gone at all how I imagined it would. Last week ended on a really sour note, and then Monday was spent with me in the ER in extreme pain. I am still recovering from, what I believe was a burst ovarian cyst. I woke up to nurse Baby Hercules, and ending crying from what felt a javelin thrust through my lower left abdomen.

By the time we got to the ER, the pain had decrease to a mostly tolerable level, but I wanted to make sure there wasn’t any complications, like my ovary twisting. 5 hours later and a male doctor telling me I was experiencing “mittelschmerz” I finally got some drugs, Tylenol, and sent home.

I could have given myself Tylenol, and no, ovulation pain, does not reduce a 30 year old woman into a puddle of tears and withering in pain. So completely unsatisfied with my care, we left the hospital and are looking forward to the medical bills for some Tylenol.

Medical care in this country is ridiculous. Women, especially, are treated poorly, and not listened too. Don’t get me started on women of color and how extremely terrible they are treated. Need an example, read about Serena Williams, here.

We need to do better, for all.

What Am I Reading: The Poldark Saga

A couple of years ago, I saw an ad on our Amazon Fire TV for a new show called Poldark. It is a historical fiction in post American revolution England. I really enjoyed it and looked anxiously forward to the next season. About the time Baby Hercules was born season three was out and if you have not seen it, I will just say the ending left me wanting to know what happened.

I didn’t not want to wait, so I did some research and learned that it is based off a 12 book series by, Winston Graham. I was able to get the first book from my local library’s overdrive ebook system.

Having already seen the first three seasons the first 6 books were slow reading as I knew what was going to happen. As with all screen adaptations there were little details missing. Which as added to the story.

Demelza is by far my favorite character. The development of her transformation from miner’s daughter to a squire’s wife is fascinating. The internal battles she has with some of the choices she makes or how she is going to react to a choice Ross has made are relatable, even though the novels take place centuries ago.

One thing about the saga that I don’t enjoy is how about book five the tone changes. The main reason is probably because there is a 20 year gap between when Winston Graham wrote and published the books. New characters are brought in and the focus changes from Ross and Francis Poldark and their quarreling with George Warleggan to the siblings of Demelza and the now feud between everyone not a Warleggan.

I am about half was through book seven and I have about a 8 week weight for book eight. (At one point is was 18 weeks!) I hope that my wait is not that long and I am desperately wanting to know why George hates Ross Poldark so much that he must destroy everything.

Righteous Fathers

Last week, I attended church in the congregation I went to in high school. After about 15 years, the building has been renovation, families have moved in and out. It was the building my mother’s funeral was held. It is strange to go back.

I only went to see my old young women’s leader. She is always so welcoming and happy. It was great to see her and chat for a bit.

While my belief in god is different from most if not all members of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints, attending church is not something I enjoy. Sunday’s are work, emotionally and physically draining.

I had plans just to attend the first hour of church and honestly, zone out while I wrestled baby Hercules. I got the opportunity to actually listen to the speakers.

The first spoke on the church’s environmental stance. Check out this website, where he got most of his talk.

The third speaker talked on the new ministering program that the church has changed from home teaching and visiting teaching.

The middle speaker is the one I want to really talk about. His talk was on father’s, specifically how to be a righteous father.

This is somewhat of a sore subject for me, especially in that building. I grew up in a “part member family”. My mother was the one who took us to church, who did all the churchy things. My dad wanted nothing to do with the church for as long as I can remember.

Many lessons on the priesthood ended with me walking out because a teacher would single me out. “Oh you don’t know what it’s like to have the priesthood in your home.” “You are a lost soul because your father won’t join the church.” “You can never fully understand the importance of the priesthood without it in your home.”

I would walk out because that teacher was not only being rude, but was completely WRONG.

When this speaker started talking, I expected more of this, but he didn’t. He started his talk saying, “Most of us assume that to be a righteous father, he must have the priesthood, but that is not true. A father can be righteous without ever stepping foot inside our or any other church. The gospel does not automatically make us righteous fathers.”

I wanted to stand up and yell, “One more time for the people in the back!”

I had NEVER heard that from the pulpit at church. This speaker wasn’t someone who didn’t know me, for awhile I think he was one of our home teachers.

How often in the church, do we ASSUME that just because he has the priesthood, this guy is a good upstanding person. It’s not true! Having the ‘priesthood’ doesn’t just magically cover up the fact that this person really is a sleazeball. “Faith” in a higher being does not make us automatically perfect righteous people. It takes hard work to be a genuine decent person. Something we all can work on, present company included.

So remember next time you are a church and someone says something boneheaded, “The Gospel does not automatically make us righteous people.”

Happy New Year!

Are you ready for a totally awesome year?

I am. I have a plan, and I am 7 days strong on my plan. It’s not easy. Only after 5 days did I notice a difference and am I really feeling good. I am enjoying waking up and walking, (slightly hobbling down the stairs). I look forward to my planned meals, and cooking them. My New Year resolution was a perfect one.

I love that my kitchen is clean every morning.

Had you going? Working out, sore muscles, and meal plans are not new to me. But having a clean house, I just don’t know where to start. I have tried FlyLady, and an app I heard about unF* your habitat. I have also tried a good old fashioned chore chart.

Maybe I am just lazy.

Despite some nights when I really just want to go to bed, I suck it up and wash the dishes, wipe down the counters and stove, and sweep the floor. I am slowly working on transitioning it to encompass the kitchen table also. But I feel like it is this catch all, that never gets clean. Maybe when I finish my online classes and the table isn’t also my desk…

Don’t Cry Over… Potato Salad

On Friday, our church had a “get to know you” activity for the congregation. We live in a congregation heavily populated by college students. We are new, and here for school, so it was fun evening, plus I didn’t have to cook!

We were asked to bring a side dish, salad, or a dessert for the BBQ provided by the church. I signed up to bring a potato salad: simple, cheap, easy, and my favorite BBQ side. The only problem, I couldn’t remember my mom’s recipe, and that is what I really wanted. My Mother’s potato salad.

When, I couldn’t remember the recipe, I picked up my phone and started to call my mom. That is when it hit me. It’s been just over 4 years, and it doesn’t get any easier. The last few months there has been many times I have want to call, but couldn’t. This time was different. Knowledge, I needed from her, was completely inaccessible.

After pulling myself back together, I texted my two sister’s. Surely, one of them would remember, or at least we could remember enough together to figure it out. My younger sister told me to just go to the store, cause she doesn’t know. The other, told me that I was just missing mayo and mustard.

But when I had it all made, it was just missing something.

It is moments like that, that just make me realize I need to be writing down my recipes and the other things that we do. I hope that for someone, it either helps them find a new food or helps them to grieve a loss too.

Fight like a Cactus

A few days ago on Instagram, I posted this picture:

I talked a little about postpartum depression, and I wanted to talk a little more about it.

First off, IT IS REAL. It manifests differently in people, and in some people it triggers other things. For me it was this weird fog that was consistent for almost 3 years! I was just kind of existing. I jumped into a bunch of parenting groups thinking it would help me find myself. Instead, it just made me crazy busy and exhausted. Parenting groups are great, I learned a lot and make some really great close friends.

But what I was missing was finding myself after baby.

This is something that isn’t talked about, how to find yourself again after baby. I don’t think I could do this topic justice. I want to share how I got out of the fog.

NUMBER ONE: You, not someone else, needs to recognize you are being true to yourself.

Going to get help, because someone else is telling you, can make it harder for you to see that you need help. If you are like me you just dig your heels in and fight back.

NUMBER TWO: Find the help that works for you.

This is hard. I tried what I thought was everything; acupuncture, counseling, essential oils, medications. Nothing really helped. Then I tried, just being healthier; diet changes, exercising, and just getting outside. This helped the most. It wasn’t until an underlying medical issue was found, that the fog lifted.

NUMBER THREE: If it works, DON’T STOP!

Seriously. Why change what works? I know we get bored, but stick with it.

Fighting for 3 years, is a long time. I am grateful Mr. Wonderful didn’t walk away, I wasn’t best wife or personal to get along with. Am I 100%? Nope, I am still working on getting back to my old self. Everyday I get closer, and it helps me to see the improvements that I have made, just like my little cactus.

Easter 2016

This Easter was a little strange for me. First off, it was in March, that ALWAYS throws me off. Secondly, I am going through a sort of spiritual reawakening.

Mr Wonderful and I have been talking about when, how, and what we should do. Jump out or jump in? After we move or right now? Maybe, just wait until the next big trial? I pointed out, maybe we should do it now. We have a 3 year old, whom we drag to church, so let’s decide now if we want to keep doing that.

So we decided to jump in, and it seemed like a perfect time to start our rediscovery journey on Easter Sunday. So we started coming up with some rules.

Dinner at the table, as a family nightly. So that we can do family prayer and scriptures right after dinner.
No TV on Sunday, except religious shows (ie Veggie Tales, or the animated scripture shows.)
No devices at the table during dinner.
We will have couple study and prayer in the morning.

For Easter, I just got some jelly beans and then a favorite treat for everyone. (Chocolate for me, of course!) I have no idea of what kind of fun traditions to do for Easter. We don’t do Santa, so no Easter Bunny. Maybe we’ll start getting new shoes for Easter…

Before we gave Mr. Z his “basket” Mr Wonderful gave a brief explanation on why at Easter we give gifts. “Christ died for us, it was a perfect gift of love. To celebrate his gift, we give gifts to one another on Easter to remember His gift.”

While we were at church today, of course right in the middle of Sacrament, Mr. Z proclaims, “NO! I don’t want Jesus to die!” We try to explain how this is good things, because now he lives again. Then he asks, “Can Grandma Nancy come back like Jesus?” While being able to understand death, the idea of resurrection is a really hard concept all around.

After church, we came home and had a nice Easter dinner, crock pot Leg of Lamb, honey carrots, roasted rosemary potatoes, and gluten free rolls. I think Leg of Lamb will be our new Easter dinner.